Allah won’t change you unless you decide to change. Everyone wants to become a better person, but some people just don’t know-how. That’s why you need to be willing to change and put some thought and effort into the idea because when there’s a will there’s a way insha’Allah. Allah says:
وَابْتَغِ فِيمَا آتَاكَ اللَّهُ الدَّارَ الْآخِرَةَ وَلَا تَنسَ نَصِيبَكَ مِنَ الدُّنْيَا وَأَحْسِن كَمَا أَحْسَنَ اللَّهُ إِلَيْكَ وَلَا تَبْغِ الْفَسَادَ فِي الْأَرْضِ إِنَّ اللَّهَ لَا يُحِبُّ الْمُفْسِدِينَ
“Seek the life to come using what Allah has granted you, but do not neglect your rightful share in this world. Do good to others as Allah has done well to you.” (Surah Al-Qasas 28:77)
To become a better person, you should learn to notice yourself and know how you behave in different situations. Then you’ll know when to improve yourself if you do something improperly and continue to do what you’re doing right. This point is very important because you can’t be a better person if you don’t know what you should improve yourself in the first place. Allah says:
وَالَّذِينَ جَاهَدُوا فِينَا لَنَهْدِيَنَّهُمْ سُبُلَنَا وَإِنَّ اللَّهَ لَمَعَ الْمُحْسِنِينَ
“And those who strive for Us, We will surely, guide them (to) Our ways. And indeed, Allah surely (is) with the good-doers.” (Surah Al-`Ankabut 29:69)
Thank Allah for the countless blessings that He showers upon you every day, and appreciate what you have instead of obsessing over what you wish you had. Also, thank people for whatever good they do to you and appreciate their thought and effort. Every time you accomplish a goal, you’ll objectively learn more about yourself and figure out ways of improvement insha’Allah.
Here are some steps to becoming a better person:
- Strengthen your heart and build self-esteem
- Being a good listener can change your life
- Helping others will help you grow in ways
- Be a better member of your community
- Be a role model for someone to really
- Be a better child to your parents
- Be a better friend to your friends
- Be a better being in this world
- Be willing to work with others
- Be thankful and appreciative
- Be a better human to others
- Explore your spirituality
- Think before you speak
- Greet everyone you meet
- Forgive and let go of anger
- Take better care of yourself
- Recognize your weaknesses
- Work on your negative traits
- See yourself for who you are
- Step out of your comfort zone
- Compliment yourself every day
- Don’t neglect your natural abilities
- Have an insatiable thirst for knowledge
- A role model gives us a concrete image
- Admit when you are wrong and apologize
- Always have the best intentions for others
- Honesty is the best remedy for any situation
- Change is the only way to grow and progress
- Challenge yourself by developing good habits
- Commit yourself to growth (Be Growth-oriented)
When you love yourself, you’ll want what’s best for it. Thus, you’ll look for whatever can make it comfortable and content. Learn to accept yourself for who you are and only then will you be able to enhance it and feel better. Tell yourself that you’re kind and compassionate, that you’re worthy and important, anything that would make you feel loved and accepted by yourself. You should start by loving yourself because you won’t be able to love other people if you don’t love yourself first. Allah says:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اصْبِرُوا وَصَابِرُوا وَرَابِطُوا وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ
“O you who believe[d]! Be steadfast and [be] patient and [be] constant and consciously revere Allah so that you may (be) successful.” (Surah Al-Imran 3:200 )
You can’t expect to change if you keep making excuses for anything that goes wrong with you, because you won’t see anything that needs to be changed with you that way. You should take accountability for your actions and take responsibility for your decisions. You shouldn’t blame anyone or anything for your mistakes. Instead, try to learn from your mistakes, which in turn will help you be a better person.
Here are some verses from the Quran to become a better person:
- “And consult them in the matter.” (Quran, 3:159)
- “Successful indeed are the believers.” (Quran 23:2)
- “He, indeed, prospers who purifies it.” (Quran 91:10)
- “Verily, for the righteous is decreed a triumph.” (Quran 78:32)
- “Verily, he, indeed, will prosper who purifies himself.” (Quran 87:15)
- “Verily, those who tremble with the fear of their Lord.” (Quran 23:59)
- “(knowledge of Islam) – Acquire it! By the Quran, rich in wisdom!” (Quran 36:2)
- “Indeed, Allah does not like those who are self-deluding and boastful.” (Quran 4:36)
- “Verily, those who invent a lie against Allah will never be successful.” (Surah Yunus, 10:69)
- “[Believers], you are the best community singled out for people: you order what is right, forbid what is wrong, and believe in God.” (Quran 3:110)
- “He will indeed be successful who purifies his self, and he will indeed fail who corrupts his himself.” (Quran 91:9-10)
Ways to Be a Better Person And Be Happy:
- Compliment Yourself: Every morning before you go on with your daily routine, take a couple of minutes to compliment yourself. And, when you’re happy with yourself, that emotion can be contagious to those around you.
- Don’t Make Excuses: Blaming your spouse, boss or client is fruitless and won’t get you very far. Instead of pointing fingers and making excuses about why you aren’t happy or successful in your personal or professional life, own your mistakes and learn from them.
- Let Go of Anger: Letting go of anger is easier said than done. While anger is a perfectly normal emotion, you can’t let it fester. When this happens, you may make unwise decisions, and more importantly, it may affect your health.
- Be Honest and Direct: Chances are you would see that as a violation of your trust. If you want to be a better person in either your personal or professional life, you should always tell the truth and state as clearly as possible what you are trying to convey.
- Always Be Polite: How much effort does it take to say, “Thank you,” or to hold the elevator door open for someone? Not much at all. However, these acts of kindness can make someone’s day. The way someone else behaves is not going to determine my behaviour.
- Be Open to Change: Whether trying a new restaurant, travelling to an unknown part of the world or doing something that has always scared you, you should always be open to change.
- Educate Yourself: If you don’t understand why one country is invading another, take the time to educate yourself on the current event. Ask a person intimately connected with the event for his or her thoughts.
- The Important Take Away: The purpose of life is to get better with age. This means that we should try our best to become better at everything that we do. This takes initiative, effort, perseverance, and patience.
- Set Goals For Yourself: Every person should have a certain aim in life. After all, we were brought into this life for a reason; build this world and work for the hereafter. For that reason, you should set goals and objectives for yourself to conquer. Allah says:
بِالْبَيِّنَاتِ وَالزُّبُرِ وَأَنزَلْنَا إِلَيْكَ الذِّكْرَ لِتُبَيِّنَ لِلنَّاسِ مَا نُزِّلَ إِلَيْهِمْ وَلَعَلَّهُمْ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
“With the clear proofs and the Books. And We sent down to you the Remembrance, that you may make clear to mankind, what has been sent down to them and that they may reflect.” (Surah An-Nahl 16:44)
If you let yourself be angry, your anger will modify your decision-making ability and you’ll start making decisions that aren’t very rational. Anger is also known for damaging relationships and negatively affecting one’s health. Allah says:
هُنَالِكَ الْوَلَايَةُ لِلَّهِ الْحَقِّ هُوَ خَيْرٌ ثَوَابًا وَخَيْرٌ عُقْبًا
“There, the protection (is) from Allah the True. He (is the) best (to) reward and (the) best (for) the end.” (Surah Al-Kahf 18:44 )
So, if you let it overtake you, it’ll prevent you from improving yourself. It might even get into trouble. I know controlling anger is a difficult task, but if you try your best to do so you will benefit from great rewards. Allah says:
وَأَقْسَمُوا بِاللَّهِ جَهْدَ أَيْمَانِهِمْ لَئِنْ أَمَرْتَهُمْ لَيَخْرُجُنَّ قُل لَّا تُقْسِمُوا طَاعَةٌ مَّعْرُوفَةٌ إِنَّ اللَّهَ خَبِيرٌ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ
“And whoso obeys Allah and His Messenger, and fears Allah, and takes Him as a shield for protection, it is they who will be successful.” (Surah An-Nur 24:53)
Faith allows getting through some pretty challenging days. It also encourages us to improve and strive to make a positive impact. If you don’t have a spiritual life, consider exploring that option. Prayer, meditation, removing your thoughts from yourself and loving your fellow man can greatly improve who you are. Becoming a better person doesn’t happen overnight, but it is possible. Believe in yourself and know that it is possible. May Allah make it easier for us. Ameen.