Anger is a normal, healthy emotion, neither good nor bad. Like any emotion, it conveys a message, telling you that a situation is upsetting, unjust, or threatening. If your knee-jerk reaction to anger is to explode. Anger is much more likely to have a negative impact on the way people see you, impair your judgment, and get in the way of success. Chronic anger that flares up all the time or spirals out of control can have serious consequences for your career. Allah says:
الَّذِينَ يُنفِقُونَ فِي السَّرَّاءِ وَالضَّرَّاءِ وَالْكَاظِمِينَ الْغَيْظَ وَالْعَافِينَ عَنِ النَّاسِ وَاللَّهُ يُحِبُّ الْمُحْسِنِينَ
“Those who spend (in God’s Cause) in prosperity and adversity, who repress anger, and who pardon the people; verily, God loves the good-doers.” (Surah Al-Imran 3:134)
Anger is an emotion that can range from mild irritation to intense rage. Angry feelings may spur you to stand up for someone or they may lead you to create social change. You can’t always control the situation you’re in or how it makes you feel, but you can control how you express your anger. Even if someone is pushing your buttons, you always have a choice about how to respond. Allah says:
صِرَطَ ٱلَّذِينَ أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيْهِمْ غَيْرِ ٱلْمَغْضُوبِ عَلَيْهِمْ وَلَا ٱلضَّآلِّينَ
“The path of those whom You have blessed, with whom You are not angry and who have not gone astray.” (Surah Al-Fatihah 1:7)
Your thoughts and behaviours can either fuel your emotions or they can reduce them. So, if you want to shift your emotional state away from anger, you can change what you’re thinking and what you’re doing. Without fuel, the fire inside you will begin to dwindle and you’ll feel calmer.
Here are some ways you can control your anger and strategies to help you calm down:
- In anger, you lead to stress, depression, and other mental problems
- In anger alienates you to clients and erodes their respect
- In anger, exercise can help your nerves and reduce anger
- In anger our your energy and emotions into productive
- In anger express your healthy and productive ways
- In anger take a timeout and give yourself a break
- In anger focus on details in the imaginary scene
- In anger turn yourself into a tangible production
- In anger diffuse your anger by looking laugh
- In anger find the most immediate solution
- In anger stop talking and let the words fly
- In anger return your emotions to neutral
- In anger slowly relax various muscle
- In anger count down and start at 100
- In anger try to cope with your matters
- In anger pretend your lips are glued shut
- In anger crank up and never steam temper
- In anger, your temper is hijacking your life
- In anger collect your thoughts and live a calm
- In anger take a deep breath as your anger grow
- In anger visualizing yourself in a relaxing scene
- In anger mentally escape and slip into a quiet room
- In anger stretch Neck rolls and shoulder rolls are good
- In anger, you face heart disease, diabetes and insomnia
- In anger find a word that helps you calm down and refocus
Anger is a normal emotion that everyone experiences from time to time. However, if you find your anger turns to aggression or outbursts, you need to find healthy ways to deal with anger. Take a moment to focus on what’s right when everything feels wrong. Realizing how many good things you have in your life can help you neutralize anger and turn around the situation. Allah says:
كُلُوا۟ مِن طَيِّبَتِ مَا رَزَقْنَكُمْ وَلَا تَطْغَوْا۟ فِيهِ فَيَحِلَّ عَلَيْكُمْ غَضَبِى ۖ وَمَن يَحْلِلْ عَلَيْهِ غَضَبِى فَقَدْ هَوَىٰ
“Eat from the good things which We have provided you, but do not abuse them or I will be angry with you. And he with whom I am angry will certainly fall.” (Surah Taha 20:81)
Anger is the temptation of Shaytaan and also the root of all evils. If we have a hot temper, we may feel like it’s out of our hands and there’s little we can do to tame the beast. We need to use some cool tools to express our emotions without hurting others and keep our temper from hijacking our life. In fact, outbursts and tirades only fuel the fire and reinforce our anger problem.
Controlling anger before it controls you:
- Anger can lead to problems at work, in your personal relationships
- Anger can become problematic if it leads to aggression
- Anger involves wasting time and upsetting events
- Anger can lead to a variety of problems
- Anger is a human emotion and turns destructive
- Anger control is important before it escalates you
- Anger is always kept unpredictable and powerful emotion
- Anger can make you feel as outbursts avoid saying that time
Anger is a strong emotion, it can feel overwhelming at times. Start by noticing what you’re angry about and why. Put into words what’s making you upset so you can act rather than react. If you feel yourself losing your cool, just walk away from the situation for a while. You’ll deal with it better when everyone, yourself included, is feeling calmer. We all should try to avoid anger as it is the disease of the soul.
Allah Almighty says in The Holy Quran:
- “The Merciful-to-all, the Mercy Giver,” (Quran 1:3)
- “So He made their deeds of no effect.” (Muhammad, 28)
- “Thus We show you some of Our greatest signs.” (Quran 20:23)
- “those whose (portion) is not wrath, and who go not astray.” (Al-Fatiha, 7)
- “The way of those on whom Thou hast bestowed Thy Grace.” (Al-Fatiha, 6)
- “We have not sent down the Qur’an for you to be distressed.” (Quran 20:2)
- “There is no god but thou: glory to thee: I was indeed wrong!” (Al-Anbiya, 87)
Anger can also mask anxiety. When you perceive a threat, either real or imagined, your body activates the “fight or flight” response. In the case of the “fight” response, it can often manifest itself as anger or aggression. To change your response, you need to find out what’s causing you to feel anxious or scared. Remember that the real strength of a man lies in controlling his wrath or anger.
Keeping temper in check can be challenging, tips to tame your temper:
- Think before you speak: Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything — and allow others involved in the situation to do the same.
- Once you’re calm, express your anger: State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them.
- Get some exercise: If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run.
- Take a timeout: Give yourself short breaks during times of the day that tend to be stressful.
- Identify possible solutions: Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand.
- Stick with ‘I’ statements: To avoid criticizing or placing blame — which might only increase tension — use “I” statements to describe the problem. Be respectful and specific.
- Don’t hold a grudge: Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice.
- Use humour to release tension: Avoid sarcasm, though — it can hurt feelings and make things worse.
- Know when to seek help: Seek help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.
Stressful events affect you, take control of your environment and avoid unnecessary aggravation. Look at your regular routine and try to identify activities, times of day, people, places, or situations that trigger irritable or angry feelings. Avoid negative thought patterns that can trigger anger. You tell yourself, “life’s not fair,” or blame others for your problems intentionally upset you, ignore your wishes, or disrespected you. Give yourself time, recognize the early signs of anger and space to process the triggers. Allah says:
لَا يَرْقُبُونَ فِى مُؤْمِنٍ إِلًّۭا وَلَا ذِمَّةًۭ ۚ وَأُو۟لَٓئِكَ هُمُ ٱلْمُعْتَدُونَ
“Respecting no tie and no protective obligation with regard to a believer, and it is they, they who transgress the bounds of what is right.” (Surah At-Tawbah 9:10)
Explore what’s really behind your anger, there’s usually a bigger issue behind it. If you find your irritation and anger rapidly rising, ask yourself, “What am I really angry about?” Identifying the real source of frustration will help you communicate your anger better, take constructive action, and work towards a resolution. If you grew up in a family where expressing feelings was strongly discouraged. As an adult, you may have a hard time acknowledging feelings other than anger.