Good manner is the key to modesty and humility. Modesty in Islam means purity of intention. Good manners keep our lifestyle modest and humble. Modesty is the main characteristic of Islam. Good manners mean to put them at ease the way that Islam recommended us to deal with. It is not just an important part of our religion Islam but also makes our social life more pleasant. Conducting good manners is not easy because it takes time. Allah says:
قَدْ أَفْلَحَ ٱلْمُؤْمِنُونَ ٱلَّذِينَ هُمْ فِي صَلاَتِهِمْ خَاشِعُونَ وَٱلَّذِينَ هُمْ عَنِ ٱللَّغْوِ مُّعْرِضُونَ
“The believers must (eventually) win through, Those who humble themselves in their prayers, Who avoid vain talk.” (Surah Al-Mu’minun 23:1-3)
Good manners are a stepping stone closer to Allah. Manners are the basis of one’s success in his daily life through which someone could make a distinctive place in the Islamic community. Good manners have lots of benefits in life. It bridges differences, maintains a good relationship, and more. Conducting good manners is difficult because people do not change easily in one night. However, you can start it with a simple “thank you” or “please” to other people. Allah says:
ادْعُ إِلَىٰ سَبِيلِ رَبِّكَ بِالْحِكْمَةِ وَالْمَوْعِظَةِ الْحَسَنَةِ وَجَادِلْهُم بِالَّتِي هِيَ أَحْسَنُ إِنَّ رَبَّكَ هُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِمَن ضَلَّ عَن سَبِيلِهِ وَهُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِالْمُهْتَدِينَ
“Call to (the) way (of) your Lord with the wisdom and the instruction the good, and discuss with them in that which (is) best. Indeed, your Lord, He (is) most knowing of who has strayed from His way, And He (is) most knowing of the guided ones.” (Surah An-Nahl 16:125)
Manners are a way of doing something, how we behave, and the way we treat others. Islam sees manners as an important thing, which means that all Muslims should have good manners. True Muslims are not only defined by their worship, prayer or performing sunnah, but also by how they perform good manners or Adab.
Here is some importance of the concept of good manner in Islam:
- Muslim communities high their good morals of justice
- Muslims should kindness and obedience to parents
- Muslims should learn and teach Islamic knowledge
- Muslims should respect elders and be kind to kids
- Muslim should communities remain quality of life
- Muslims should avoid every bad conversation
- Muslims should show modesty and humility
- Manners make our social life more pleasant
- Good manners lead man to Paradise
- Good manners make close to Allah
- Muslims should get a positive vibe
- Muslims should honour the guest
- Good manners increase faith
- Don’t say what you don’t do
- Don’t insult others’ false gods
- Don’t take items without right
- Don’t deceive people in the trade
- Don’t ask unnecessary questions
- Don’t be miserly nor extravagant
- Don’t claim yourselves to be pure
- Don’t let hatred cause you to be unjust
- Don’t ask too many favours from people
- Dealing with one’s parents in the best manner
- Don’t criticize the small contributions of others
Human nature desires a society based on morals and manners which provides a stable and secure life leading to liberty and happiness for all people. The onus is on all Muslims to ensure good morals which are preserved by way of self-education and practising exemplary behaviour. Allah says:
فَذَرْهُمْ يَخُوضُوا وَيَلْعَبُوا حَتَّىٰ يُلَاقُوا يَوْمَهُمُ الَّذِي يُوعَدُونَ
“So leave them (to) converse vainly and amuse themselves until they meet their Day, which they are promised.” (Surah Al-Ma`arij 70:42)
Islam takes friendship at a higher level as we refer to each other as brother and sister and expect to treat them. A great Muslim is also seen by their basic manners to the elderly or noble person. The man with good morals is considered the foundation on which the structure of a sound Islamic society is built, and is among the causes of giving strength to Muslims.
Practising Good Manners
- The virtuous of behaviour: We consider all aspects of our virtuous behaviour are essential ways of being led on the right path.
- Makes doing good: Practice makes perfect and we should practise conducting ourselves with the best of morals, like truth, courage, generosity, mercy, benevolence and forgiveness.
- Avoid to bad manners: Avoiding people characterised by bad manners and not making them friends. Such people removes the danger of being misled and should also discourage their unprincipled behaviour.
- Ask the forgiveness of Allah: We should also ask the forgiveness of Allah in case of committing sins or doing evil deeds and should regret and repent for such actions.
- Build a sound Islamic society: The man with good morals is considered the foundation on which the structure of a sound Islamic society is built, and is among the causes of giving strength to Muslims.
- Injustice and rising crime spreading in immoral societies: Muslim communities lose their good morals of justice, mercy and benevolence, they will be destroyed, and all the scientific progress and abundance of wealth can not prevent it. When moral principles are abandoned, the quality of life is disrupted and led astray.
- The complete and the best manners: Allah, has given man intellect and made him a creature who thinks and differentiates between good and evil. He shows him what is the best and what is the worst and what is the most desirable and what is the most disliked among deeds.
مَّن يَشْفَعْ شَفَاعَةً حَسَنَةً يَكُن لَّهُ نَصِيبٌ مِّنْهَا وَمَن يَشْفَعْ شَفَاعَةً سَيِّئَةً يَكُن لَّهُ كِفْلٌ مِّنْهَا وَكَانَ اللَّهُ عَلَىٰ كُلِّ شَيْءٍ مُّقِيتًا
“Whoever intercedes for a good cause will have a reward therefrom, and whoever intercedes for an evil cause will have a burden therefrom. And ever is Allah, over all things, a Keeper.” (Surah An-Nisa 4:85)
Allah bids us towards the best morals and will reward us accordingly on Resurrection Day and also forbids us against bad morals for which He will duly punish us. Mankind is undoubtedly is a social creature. Good manner helps to establish good relationships. Conducting a good manner and relationship will always make your path easier to go through.
Allah Almighty says in The Holy Quran:
- “Don’t insult others’ false gods.” (Quran 6:108)
- “Don’t take items without right.” (Quran 3:162)
- “Don’t be miserly nor extravagant.” (Quran 25:67)
- “Don’t call others with bad names.” (Quran 49:11)
- “Don’t claim yourselves to be pure.” (Quran 53:32)
- “Don’t deceive people in the trade.” (Quran 6:152)
- “Don’t ask unnecessary questions.” (Quran 5:101)
- “Don’t let hatred cause you to be unjust.” (Quran 6:108)
- “Don’t ask too many favours from people.” (Quran 2:273)
- “Don’t call the Prophet how you call others.” (Quran 24:63)
- “Don’t criticize small contributions of others.” (Quran 9:79)
- “Don’t accuse others of immorality without proof.” (Quran 24:4)
- “Don’t call someone a disbeliever without knowing.” (Quran4:94)
- “Don’t wrongly consume the wealth of the vulnerable.” (Quran 4:29)
- “Don’t turn your cheek away from people in arrogance.” (Quran 31:18)
- “Don’t hold secret meetings for sin, rather do so for piety.” (Quran 58:9)
- “Don’t order others to do good while forgetting it yourself.” (Quran 2:44)
Good manners surely indicate the goodness of the upright human soul while bad manners indicate that the soul of that man is evil and wicked. A good human soul is like a sweet flower from which fragrant perfume is emitted. The human soul needs to develop educationally to become characterised by the best of morals and refrain from evil doings. Allah says:
وَلَا يَأْتَلِ أُولُو الْفَضْلِ مِنكُمْ وَالسَّعَةِ أَن يُؤْتُوا أُولِي الْقُرْبَىٰ وَالْمَسَاكِينَ وَالْمُهَاجِرِينَ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ وَلْيَعْفُوا وَلْيَصْفَحُوا أَلَا تُحِبُّونَ أَن يَغْفِرَ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ وَاللَّهُ غَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ
“And not let swear those of virtue among you and the amplitude of means that they give (to) the near of kin, and the needy and the emigrants in (the) way (of) Allah. And let them pardon and let them overlook. (Do) not you like that Allah should forgive you? And Allah (is) Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (Surah An-Nur 24:22)
Good manners have lots of benefits in life. Conducting good manners is more than just a way to level up our faith. It is a way to always stay faithful to Allah and Islam. Muslims should talk to other people both to fellow Muslims and non-muslim in a gentle, clear, low voice, moderate in the pace of talking and avoid vain conversation. Islam loves peace. Allah says:
وَحَرَّمْنَا عَلَيْهِ الْمَرَاضِعَ مِن قَبْلُ فَقَالَتْ هَلْ أَدُلُّكُمْ عَلَىٰ أَهْلِ بَيْتٍ يَكْفُلُونَهُ لَ
“And We had forbidden for him the wet nurses before, so she said, “Shall I direct you to (the) people (of) a house who will rear him for you while they to him (will be) sincere?” (Surah Al-Qasas 28:12)
Good Manners are important to fulfil our faith and also in our social life. Good manners and a sense of morality can prevent us from falling into sins. It is not just an important part of our religion Islam but also makes our social life more pleasant. May Allah Almighty give us the strength to improve our manners and try to imitate them! Ameen