We should never argue with Mother 

The Status of Mothers in Islam

The word mother is not only a word. It’s a blessing and a gift from Almighty Allah. It is the first word a baby utters, loves and calls out loud no matter it is a happy or sad moment of its life. The mother-child relationship is the most important one and it’s reciprocal. A mother loves her baby without any condition, bears pain with a smile and sacrifices everything without any complaint. When the babies grow up, it’s their duty and responsibility to be kind and at the service of their parents, especially their mother. Allah says:

يَوْمَ تَرَوْنَهَا تَذْهَلُ كُلُّ مُرْضِعَةٍ عَمَّا أَرْضَعَتْ وَتَضَعُ كُلُّ ذَاتِ حَمْلٍ حَمْلَهَا وَتَرَى النَّاسَ سُكَارَىٰ وَمَا هُم بِسُكَارَىٰ وَلَٰكِنَّ عَذَابَ اللَّهِ شَدِيدٌ

“The) Day you will see it, will forget every nursing mother that which she was nursing, and will deliver every pregnant woman her load, and you will see [the] mankind intoxicated, while not they (are) intoxicated; but (the) punishment (of) Allah (will be) severe.” (Surah Al-Hajj 22:2)

Mothers in Islam are held in very high esteem. The importance of serving one’s mother is more than Jihad, which is otherwise a much-appreciated act. In everyone’s life, a mother holds the most important role. A child would never live unless a mother gave birth to her. Upon giving birth, she risked her life, even willing to die as long as the child survive. A big sacrifice that our mother made made us indebted to her in our entire life. Allah says:

وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ وَفِصَالُهُ فِي عَامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ

“And We have enjoined (upon) man for his parents – carried him his mother (in) weakness upon weakness, and his weaning (is) in two years that “Be grateful to Me and your parents; towards Me (is) the destination.” (Surah Luqman 31:14)

The most important person in the life of a child is his mother. One of the most amazing things about Islam is Islam gives mothers (as well as any woman)  the highest position and commands children to be grateful, respectful, kind and obedient to their mothers. Islam gives mothers a status greater than that can be found in any other religion or ideology in the world. Amongst the examples of how Islam honours women.

The word mother is the favourite word in the world. We all arrived on earth by a mother, here are some importance of the “Mothers”:

  1. We should create positive thoughts about our Mother
  2. We should never argue with Mother, nor blame them
  3. We should honour Mother and guard their reputation
  4. We should never speak to Mother with a loud voice
  5. We should serve Mother as much as we can
  6. We should never give Mother an angry look
  7. We should show gratitude towards Mother
  8. We should show tolerance towards Mother
  9. We should express our gratitude to Mother
  10. We should  give a charity on Mother behalf
  11. We should never give them an angry look
  12. We should recognize their great status
  13. We should know the duties of Mother
  14. We should help without their asking 
  15. We should have positive thoughts
  16. We should never argue with Mother 
  17. Make daily Du’a (prayer) for Mother
  18. Mother provides all your needs
  19. Mother is a loyal supporter
  20. Mother always love you
  21. Mother is a teacher in life
  22. Speak politely to your Mother
  23. Do not laugh at Mother mistakes
  24. Read the Quran on Mother behalf
  25. Treat well relatives during their life 
  26. Speak humbly yourself before Mother
  27. Do not do things that can upset Mother
  28. Respond to Mother quickly with a smile 
  29. Never speak to Mother with a loud voice
  30. Respect Mother opinions and principles
  31. Be patient with Mother when they are old
  32. Watch your language when you are with Mother

A mother has great respect for her entire family. She is to be obeyed. There are many verses of the Holy Quran which talks about the rights of the mother. However, the Holy Prophet (PBUH) has enjoined goodness to the mother. A man came for advice to the Prophet (SAW) as to who should be treated well. The Prophet (PBUH) advised him to be good with his mother.

Three times the man asked, and three times Prophet (PBUH) told him to do good to his mother. At the fourth time, the Prophet (PBUH) told him to do good to his father. This illustrates the position of the mother in Islam. Allah’s Messenger (SAW) says, “It is one of the greatest sins that a man should curse his parents.” Allah says:

لَن تَنَالُوا الْبِرَّ حَتَّىٰ تُنفِقُوا مِمَّا تُحِبُّونَ وَمَا تُنفِقُوا مِن شَيْءٍ فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ بِهِ عَلِيمٌ

“Never will you attain [the] righteousness until you spend from what you love. And whatever you spend of a thing then indeed, Allah of it (is) All-Knowing.” (Surah Al ‘Imran 3:92)

Our mother hardship continue after our birth. She has to give up her sleep, her time, and her time to care for us and make sure we grow healthily. The importance of the mother in Islam, and life, in general, is very high. Her role is irreplaceable and nobody will be able to love as much as our mother does.

How to Behave with Your Mother – Islamic Teachings

  • Always be kind to your mother
  • Do not repel her and speak softly
  • Always obey her if it is not against Deen
  • Always show gratitude towards your mother
  • Beat the service of your mother whenever she needs you
  • Never express annoyance even if she is doing something annoying
  • Pray for her. The best prayer is the one Allah teaches us in the Quran

The pain our mother felt when giving birth to us will never be equal to anything in this world. However, that is why the children feel good at home because of their mother. Sacrifices of the mother for the child are unmatchable in the world; she gives up her sleep as well just to make her child all right. Allah says:

وَهَٰذَا كِتَابٌ أَنزَلْنَاهُ مُبَارَكٌ مُّصَدِّقُ الَّذِي بَيْنَ يَدَيْهِ وَلِتُنذِرَ أُمَّ الْقُرَىٰ وَمَنْ حَوْلَهَا وَالَّذِينَ يُؤْمِنُونَ بِالْآخِرَةِ يُؤْمِنُونَ بِهِ وَهُمْ عَلَىٰ صَلَاتِهِمْ يُحَافِظُونَ

“And this (is) a Book, We have revealed it, blessed, confirming which (came) before it, so that you may warn (the) mother (of) the cities and who (are) around it. And those who believe in the Hereafter, they believe in it, and they, over their prayers (are) guarding.” (Surah Al-An`am 6:92)

The sacrifice our mother made is incredible. She was willing to give up her life for us, bearing the pain of labouring a child, and later giving up her time to raise her children. The love of the mother towards the child is unmatchable. Whether the child is obedient or troublemaker, old or young, healthy or ill, the love remains the same for her child.

Allah Almighty says in The Holy Quran:

  • “And he’s carrying and his weaning is in thirty months.” (Quran 46:15)
  • “Behold! We sent to thy mother, by inspiration, the message.” (Surah Ta-Ha, 38)
  • “(He) hath made me kind to my mother, and not overbearing or miserable.” (Surah Maryam, 32)
  • “And (made me) dutiful to my mother, and He has not made me a wretched tyrant.” (Quran 19:32)
  • “We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; in pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth.” (Quran 46:15)
  • “And verily, it is in the mother of the Book, in Our Presence, high (in dignity), full of wisdom.” (Surah Az-Zukhruf, 4)
  • “Allah doth blot out or confirm what He pleaseth: with Him is the mother of the Book.” (Surah Ar-Rad, 39)

This is the reason why Islam has ordered a woman to stay home, to look after their children but nowadays usually women are busy making their career instead of looking after their child which should be her priority.

Here are some qualities of the Mothers:

  1. A Symbol of Love and Sacrifice
  2. Possessing a Noble Character
  3. Highly Honored in the Quran
  4. Have Heaven Under Her Feet
  5. Obeying Her is a Good Deed
  6. Obeyed by the Children
  7. Genuine Love of a Mother
  8. An Unpaid Debt to a Mother
  9. Risking Her Life for Her Child
  10. Allah’s Blessing Depends On Hers
  11. Bring Someone Closer to Allah SWT
  12. Holding a Higher Position Than Father

Islam has stressed the importance of the mother through the Holy Quran. It shows how highly honoured a mother is in religion. Every mother is the best mother for their child. Thus, no mother is a bad person. She possesses a noble character. A good mother places the needs of the child, both physical and emotional needs. There is no other relationship other than a mother who gives away all her peace just to make her child in peace. Allah says:

وَإِنَّهُ فِي أُمِّ الْكِتَابِ لَدَيْنَا لَعَلِيٌّ حَكِيمٌ

“And indeed, it (is) in (the) Mother (of) the Book with Us, surely exalted, full of wisdom.” (Surah Az-Zukhruf 43:4)

Every mother is a symbol of genuine love and huge sacrifice, due to the deeds she has done to her child. When a mother gave birth to a child, her heart was full by none other but her child. A mother shows her love in different forms, sometimes she also scolds her child just because she cares and doesn’t want the child to be involved in any chaotic activity. Allah says:

وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ وَفِصَالُهُ فِي عَامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ

“And We have enjoined (upon) man for his parents – carried him his mother (in) weakness upon weakness, and his weaning (is) in two years that “Be grateful to Me and your parents; towards Me (is) the destination.” (Surah Luqman 31:14)

Respecting a mother make someone closer to Allah SWT. Seeing that the importance of the mother in Islam is undeniable, we should be respectful and treat our mother with kindness always. She has provided us with love ever since the first day of our lives so we must never make her cry or be disappointed. Obeying our mother is the fastest way to reach Jannah and blessing of Allah SWT. Allah says:

وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوْلًا كَرِيمًا

“And has decreed your Lord, that (do) not worship except Him Alone and to the (be) good. Whether reach with you the old age one of them, or both of them, then (do) not say to both of them a word of disrespect and (do) not repel them, but speak to them a word noble.” (Surah Al-Isra, 17:23)

A mother always tries to safeguard her child in every difficulty. Be kind to your parents, shower love, affection and piety, both in words and deeds, treat them softly and never harm them verbally or physically. So after all the years of suffering, hardship, love, and care, could we not, at least, compensate our mothers for what they have done for us and pay them back their rights. Allah says:

وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ وَفِصَالُهُ فِي عَامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ

“And We have enjoined on man [to be good] to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him and his weaning was over two years. Be thankful to Me and your parents, unto Me is the final destination.” (Surah Luqman 31:14)

May Allah give us the ability to understand and obey his command. It is never too late to become a better child of your mother and make Allah pleased with you. O Allah, have mercy upon my mother and keep her happy in the world as well as in the hereafter. Ameen.